It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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