So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
There are leaves in my underwear?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
