The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
