New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Randomize