My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
