There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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