I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Randomize
