we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
