Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
