Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
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