We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize