my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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