Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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