you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
