At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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