East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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