If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize