hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
