Christians are straight up FREAKS
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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