absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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