Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize