Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
