Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
