i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
