And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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