Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Randomize
