I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
