Porn is love you can see.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
