I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize
