I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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