Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
ttyl tear gas
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize