Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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