can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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