I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
