i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
