I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
