Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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