Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
