Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
