Plan B is the new Plan A
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize