He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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