What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
