I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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