they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
