I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Randomize
