An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
he just fucked me for my cheese..
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
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