that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize
