And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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