i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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