Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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