i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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