Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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