You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
