hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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